The Pitching Staff of Men, for Women.

Hey!

As promised, this is the Pitching Staff of men, brought to you by The Doc. I will forward those angry emails right on for you....

#1 Starter: Johnny Depp



Yes, it's good to be Captain Jack Sparrow... He got over $60 million to do the latest movie. Not bad. That oughta keep his kids in fancy french english language schools...








#2 Starter: George Clooney



It's not bad to be George, either. Plowing through supermodels like a snowplow, and riding the Harleys in your collection... Not bad.





#3 Starter: Hugh Jackman



A former "Sexiest man alive" winner... Probably could be a #1 starting pitcher on a weaker staff...






Now look, I'm not gay (not that theres anything wrong with that), so I have no clue... But for my personal frame of reference, if I'm in a bar, and Hugh Jackman walks in?? Even putting aside the celebrity aspect for a second... Good looking dude, with a sexy australian accent, and cash bulging in his pockets. Yeah. I'm done here. Time to go.

Anyway, moving along...

#4 Starter: Clive Owen





I don't know that I have any big impression of Clive Owen. He was the guy who robbed the bank in that Denzel Washington movie, right??? Now I have to google it, hold on... Yes he was, it was called Inside Man. I do remember him from Shoot 'Em Up and the first Bourne Identity movie also. More on The Bourne Identity later... Ooops, spoiler alert.






#5 Starter: Bruce Willis



It's good to be Detective John McLain, too...



And who can forget Armageddon... Nice.







So much for the Starting Pitchers.

Bullpen, in no particular order:

Ewan MacGregor



All I know about this guy is he was the young Obi-Wan in the Star Wars Movies, and he was good...




Matt Damon



Oh yeah, this guy was the STAR of The Bourne Identity. How does he end up in the bullpen? I'm confused.




And he plays poker! Remember kids, never try to bluff people who have a ton of money... They WILL call you.



Jason Statham





I liked him in The Italian Job, and some of his other action roles... Speaking of The Italian Job...

Mark Wahlberg



Who can forget Marky Mark! Heh heh, those days are gone. Turned to acting. Good move. I like a lot of his movies...




Shooter is one of my favorite movies.... Very re-watchable. Bob Lee Swagger, brought to life on the silver screen (or the 60 inch LCD) from the excellent novel "Point of Impact". I just got my Blu-Ray of this movie, actually.



Clay Matthews, Jr.



I'm pretty sure we're all familiar with Mr. Matthews' work on sundays in the NFL....




Apparently, he knew where the weight room was at USC.... Yeah.

Viggo Mortensen



Of course we all remember him from The Lord of the Rings, but he's done a ton of movies, many of them good....





You learn a lot researching these things... Apparently, that Paint Horse he rode in the movie "Hidalgo" was one of his own horses, from champion bloodlines. Who knew?? And for my money, he should play John Marston in the Movie Version of "Red Dead Redemption", but that's just one man's opinion....

Now, as I pointed out, this isn't my list. To continue my "bar" analogy, the guys I do NOT want to see walk in, besides some of the guys on this list: I don't wanna see Matthew McConaughey walk in. If you didn't see The Lincoln Lawyer, check that out. I don't want to see Pierce Brosnan strolling in. I don't want to see either Detective James "Sonny" Crockett walk in, Don Johnson or Colin Farrell. I definitely don't want to see Leonardo Di Caprio walking in.... Or Jon Bon Jovi, for that matter. I've seen Bon Jovi three times, and the girls, even the adult girls, start screaming as soon as he takes the stage... And, I really don't want to see Brad Pitt or Russell Crowe walk in, either. Daniel Craig. But that's just me. As I freely admit, I have no clue what women really want....

Anyway, There's your pitching staff! Enjoy!

Week 6 and 7....

Yeah, I continue to fall behind.... So busy. Covered 2900 miles in the last 4 days. Not too shabby, for a white boy from the suburbs.... Heh heh!!

Anyhoo, week 6: Bulldogs Rule! Hey, congrats fellas. I had a laugh, the Packer game wrapped up quickly, and they were one of like 3 people who didn't have the Packers for 16... So I laughed, they were behind the 8 ball early... and then surged to a win. The pool was over by 6 PM sunday afternoon. We were all mathmatically out. I guess they had the last laugh....

Ahem, anyway, Week 7 was Ardita, scoring big with the Bears shocking upset over the Tampa Bay Bucs, in London. Nice job man. 13 points, on Lovie Smith and Jay Cutler. Some things, I just can't do.

The Christian Ponder era started with a bang in Minneapolis. Big TD pass for his first throw. Not too bad. I was watching that game in Florida, and the Packer fans present were nervous, I'm not gonna lie. The Metrodome has been a house of horrors over the years anyway.

The Carson Palmer Era started in Oakland... with a Pick-6. Ooops, not what they were looking for. Hey, if Al Davis was still alive, this never would have happened.... Oh wait, that joke doesn't work any more, Al Davis actually passed away. Sorry Al.

Do you think Al is up in heaven, complaining about the Franco Harris Immaculate Reception play??? He maintained all his life that that football Harris snagged had touched the ground, and it was no catch... The NFL Films footage is unclear on whether it may or may not have touched... Do you think he's complaining to Saint Peter about the tuck rule call that sent Tom Brady and The Patriots to the Super Bowl??? Al never stopped complaining about that either. Actually, neither did Jon Gruden, until he got a job in television...

The Tim Tebow Era got started in Denver. With a crazy come from behind miracle win. Wow. I don't know what to think of Tebow. He takes a lotta heat from the press. I loved him with the Florida Gators. Electrifying college player. But really, he's not the only QB in the league with accuracy issues. Cough, Mark Sanchez, cough. Ahem, sorry, clearing my throat. He's not the only QB who doesn't make great defensive reads all the time. Eli Manning, Tavaris Jackson, Kevin Kolb, Mike Vick, Phillip Rivers.... There's plenty of Bad Quarterbacking to go around. We live in a world where Matt Moore has started for the Dolphins, and played brutally bad football. Curtis Painter is starting in Indy. Sexy Rex Grossman (Chicago fans just had Vietnam flashbacks upon seeing Rex Grossman's name in print) is too sexy for his starting job in Washington, after throwing 176 picks, and has been replaced by John Beck, also brutal. (John Beck?? Who? I know, I never heard of him either). Kyle Boller for the Raiders, who was so impressive after the injury to Jason Campbell that they went out and wildly overpaid for Carson Palmer. So, what, Tim Tebow can't be a Quarterback in this league??? But the rest of these bums get a pass??? Yeah, I think I'm fine with Tebow. Give him a shot. He literally can't be worse than half a dozen other QB's in this league... Tim needs to hire Eli Mannings PR people. They've actually convinced some people that Eli Manning is a good QB. Talk about earning your money, whew.

Yep, another gratuitous shot at Eli. I can't help myself!! Actually, his QB rating this year is a breathtaking 101. Well above his career rating of 80.1. 11 TD's against 5 picks and 4 fumbles. You know what that means.... He is DUE. he is overdue for a stinker game. This week, Miami at the New York Giants. Hmm. Maybe not this week. Maimi is better on the road, though.... Not so much booing from the home field crowd...

Anyway, I previewed the pitching staff of men, for our female readers. Yes, we actually have some!!! And, they have some opinions. I shoulda figured. Anyone who ever had a girlfriend or a wife should have known that yes, women have opinions. And yes, they will share those opinions. Heh heh! If I keep cracking wise, a week without hot meals and other things awaits me.

So, I'll just leave it right there! Good enough.

Congrats to our winners. Good luck this week. The pitching staff of men is coming!!!

Week 4, Week 5, and counting....

Hey!

Yeah, I know, I'm falling behind here...

First off, congrats to Air Myles, winning week 5 in a tiebreaker. Erin07 needed the Bears to win, to hold his lead. yeah, hitching your wagon to Lovie Smith is never a good feeling.

Second off, congrats to powerhouse Sears for his week 4 win. Kathb4 could have done it, if Indy hangs on to win. That game was closer than I thought it might be.

Matt Holliday just homered, St Louis 1, Brewers nothing.n tucked it in the right field corner, a homer by 2 feet. Story of the series.

The Fraud that is Eli Maning Update: Another fraudulant performance. Seattle 36, NY Giants 25. Seattle flies across the country, wanders into the Meadowlands (or is it Snoopy Field now?), and spanks the Giants. Heh. Hitching your wagon to Eli Manning is never a good feeling either. Gambling degenerates will always tell you to beware of the west cost team that has to fly across the country and play an east coast team in their place.... and yet, there it is, opposite theory.

Ricky Weeks just made a brutal brutal error. Brutal. I get it, that he was weak defensively when he came up, but that was several years ago. By now, he's gotta make a simple play. I swear, I'll send Ron Roenicke $100 if he benches Rickie Weeks right now. Pull him outta the game. It's the frickin playoffs. Perform or sit. Shaun Marcum can have some complany in The Federal Witness Protection Program... Rickie Weeks.

Holy cow, Randy Wolf, Brewers pitcher, just laced a one-out double to right... nice, dude. And now Tony Plush, Nyjer Morgan, hit by a pitch... Eh. Stranded. Inning over.

Cheerleader Update: San Diego Chargers


They had plenty to cheer about against the Dolphins. If you were trying to "suck for Luck", do you think you'd NOT fire Tony Sparano, sit down Chad Henne with an injury surgery, and sign Sage Rosenfels??? You might. Sounds like a plan. I heard somewhere it doesn;t matter what the question is, the answer is never Sage Rosenfels.

Allen Craig, home run to center. 2-0 Cardinals. Who?? Who is Allen Craig???

Did I mention this is a must win for the Brewers???

Roman Harper says the $15,000 fine he got for a late hit on Steve Smith was worth it. 15k... Sounds expensive to me.

The Detroit Lions are 5-0. Kind of amazing. I mean, so are the Packers, but that's not as much of a surprise.

Cowboys had a bye week. So, we got a week without 100 stories about how Tony Romo sucks. Kinda nice, really, to have a break from that.... Now they face the Patriots. Ouch. Prepare for more stories about how Tony Romo stinks...

Wow, Hairston, miracle slide, Brewers tie the Cardinals, 2-2.

Anybody see the E:60 feature on ESPN?? The one where they interviewed Aaron Rodgers?? Very nice.

Anybody see "A Football Life: Kurt Warner" on NFL Network?? Amazing. Really good. They re-run them from time to time, try to catch that.

I guess I'd be remiss if I didn't menation that the Tim Tebow Era is officially underway in Denver. If guys like Tavaris Jackson, Sage Rosenfels, and Eli Manning can be starters in this league, why not???

Al Davis passed away. I had a lotta fun with the Cryptkeeper over the years... Or should I say, Emporer Palatine. Yeah, it got a little painful to watch there at the end, but in his younger days, he built a winner out of misfits and castoffs and really did things his own way, and had a lotta success.

Don't look now, but the San Diego Chargers did not play so bad the first few weeks. They're 4-1, instead of 1-4. Without a hole to climb out of, what will they do to focus for the rest of the season???

Andy Reid has given the dreaded "vote of confidence" to defensive coordinator Juan Castillo. Heh. Hold onto that house payment, Juan... Big rumor that supposedly the Eagles were trying to bring in Eric Mangini to coach their defense. Which the Eagles are now claiming was a "fabrication"...

It's early in the Kevin Kolb era in Arizona, but to this point, he's no Kurt Warner. He might be more of a Matt Leinart, but we'll see...

Randy Wolf just put up another zero....

Saw the GoodYear Blimp up close in Milwaukee early this week. Impressive. It's much bigger than the little MetLife Blimp that hangs around the golf tournaments.

Also, I should mention, we have a new player in the pool. Phanatic Philly Fan is in. He paid the full $85, so there's nothing funny. He had full knowledge that the pool was underway....

Kind of a tough time to be a fan in Philly. Phillies out, and the "Dream Team" Eagles are in the basement of the NFC East at 1-4. Ouch.

Anyways, have a great week!!!