I wanted to thank everyone for participating this year, it really was a blast. There won't be any payouts this year though... I took the money and bought this:
So thanks very much, I appreciate that.....
(Editor's Note: that is NOT TRUE. Payments went out yesterday.)
No, no, Joking.... I have a fiduciary responsibility, which I take very seriously.... I did go to a place called "World Class Driving" while I was in Las Vegas, and I got to drive that car for awhile..... And Yes, it was every bit as awesome as you are imagining.... It goes 130 like your car goes 30.... I highly recommend it. It was a blast....
For the record, that is a Ferrari 458 Italia....
Well, 2014 is here. The Regular Season is over. I have pretty much set a record for least amount of blog posts I've put up in a season.....
(And the bar was set pretty low last year...)
Sorry about that.
It feels like we've had the funeral for the Packers Season about 5 times now.... they were dead & buried after the Thanksgiving disaster, they were finished after they miraculously beat Atlanta, but then the Bears beat Dallas, so that was that...... then We beat Dallas, but Chicago also won, Rodgers still not back, ugh..... Then Chicago loses, Detroit loses to the Putrid Giants & the Fraud that is Eli Manning.... but then we lose to stupid Pittsburgh, ugh, season over, again.....
Setting up a week 17 Showdown with the Bears... a game that went so poorly, I actually was feeling like, fine, this season has been so bad anyways, let's just let it end mercifully.... It feels like we've hit this patient with the defibrillator about 20 times, to keep his heart pumping.... Maybe it's time to let it go.... but then in a miracle flurry of 4th down conversions, we win the game.
Feels like this is funeral #5, coming up.... Colin Kaepernick owns us. Harbaugh owns us. We BARELY got past the Bears.
Anyways.... Before we get into it here, How about The Michigan State Spartans!!!!
Sparty!
I may have had a sizeable wager or two on that game.... Michigan State even money +7 points, and Michigan State at 2 to 1 to win the game outright..... Coach Dantonio, I salute you, I salute your team, and your magical win over Stanford in the Rose Bowl.... Note to Brett Bielema, that's how you do it, jerkface.....
Anyways, let's move on to the Congratulations here....
Week 13, DJS26 went back to back with another win! Insane. Nice job man. More on DJS later. A new player this year....
Week 14, Bulldogs Rule AGAIN!!! I'm just going to put that in my paste buffer, and leave it there, so I don't have to keep typing it over & over & over until I puke......
Week 15, The Florida Boys! Their second win of the year.... These guys in Florida, I swear....
Week 16, Studmonkey!!! Another new player! Hold on, this guy does not live in Florida.... Sorry, you have to be present in Florida to win..... ahh, too bad....
(Editors note: That is NOT TRUE.)
And week 17, To make it all complete, Brady01, another new player.... From where?? Florida. 'Natch. Of course.
Seriously, congrats to all the weekly winners. Any new players are going to have to FAIL a football IQ test... fair warning.
Side note: My season seems like a loss, and it was, I won nothing.... But I did lead the Season's Standings for awhile, and I did post 5 second place finishes, and 2 3rd place finishes. Digging through the records, I can't find anyone who finished second 5 frickin times..... Oh well. It's a record of some sort, I guess.....
Anyways, the Season's Champions:
3rd Place for the Season: HIGHZ! Hey, congrats man! Long long long time player, Founder of this pool.... Well done.
2nd Place for the Season: DJS26! Congrats man! A new player, a friend of Big Headed Holy Rollers... Quite a performance for a first timer. You probably have no idea how hard it is to do what you just did. 2 weekly wins, and 2nd for the season.... nice.
Season's Champion: SMITTY201! Hey, congrats!!! Smitty was 2nd for the Season last year, which is also quite impressive. So close to the unreal back-to-back championships that Ardita put up.... Still a tremendous win. Congrats to you. Heavy lies the Crown.... You'll see.... Besides the beautiful cash, you do get the Priceless Bragging Rights for a whole year, and you can freely refer to yourself as "The Fearless Leader" for a whole year....
This was a tough year. Lots of Perennial Power Players, shut out. Not just me. Kathb4, Sears, Elusive, Badgergil, Erin07.... all shut out.
What a season. These Football Seasons really fly by, don't they???
Well, now, NOW we really have to tighten those chinstraps, and lace up those pads.... It's the PLAYOFFS! You better come correct with it.
I'm not sure I'm feeling anything for these games.... I quietly like the San Diego Chargers, getting 7 points. Fair warning though, that's not a popular opinion. I've been waiting all year to bet against Andy Dalton in the playoffs.... and here we are. He's been throwing picks like crazy lately....
I may have to bet San Fran straight up to win, in the classic "Patrick" betting formula.... Let me read from the manual here: "Betting the opponent assures you of a win. If "Your" Team wins, you're perfectly happy to lose the bet. If "Your" Team loses, you at least have cash winnings, to soothe the pain... Note: the wager should not be overly large. Also note: If your team is an underdog, you must moneyline the opponent, lest you leave the door open for a double loss, ie opponent wins straight up but does not cover, meaning you lose both ways"
There you go. Everybody got that?? Good. I also quietly like the Saints to beat the Eagles. The NFC East may have been even worse than the NFC North this year.... So by default, someone had to win it... I'm not sure we should be so enthralled with this Eagles team, that needed to beat the Cowboys week 17 to finally stumble into the division lead..... yeah, I know, the Saints can't win on the road.... I just think I want my wagon hitched to Drew Brees and Sean Payton in the Playoffs. You bet Nick Foles, and by the 3rd quarter, you'll be wondering why you bet on Nick Foles, and taking a couple more Celebrex's with your rum & cokes.......
Apologies to Phanatic Philly Phan for that last comment.... sorry man. He's Nick Foles! I can't help it!
Remember December 8th??? I bet the Patriots vs Cleveland to go OVER 46 points.... checking my phone in the airport, it was like 19 to 14, with 4 minutes to go.... It looked really really bad. Then the Patriots exploded all over Cleveland, and I ended up winning the bet easily. Now, I knew you could mail in a winning ticket, and get paid, but I had never done it before, until now....
Now, some of you know, I've won Poker Tournaments before.... but never at the MGM Grand. Kathb4 Won one at the MGM Grand last month, and the winners of THEIR Tournaments get one of these.....
Now I'm like, so jealous.... I want one of those!!!! Seriously, congrats to Kathb4....
Alright, I like to do this every year.... How did we do against professional handicappers???
Ron Jaworski 174-81
Smitty201 171-84
Bulldogs Rule 171-84
Big Headed Holy Rollers 170-85
KC Joyner, "The Football Scientist", allegedly uses proprietary metrics from his own personal game tape study. 169-86
Patrick686 168-87 (I don't need to watch much tape to know Eli Manning stinks)
DJS26 167-88
Florida Boys 166-89
Highz 165-90
Halftag 165-90
(did you guys text each other your picks???)
Cris Carter, HOF'er 164-91
Phanatic Philly Phan 164-91
Kathb4 163-92
Sears 163-92
That makes me feel a little better.... We pick games as well as the best of the Pros.... On a quick pass thru the internet, I didn't see anyone with better picks than these..... so, well done, people, well done....
That's all I have for you. I'm done. It's the Playoffs! Enjoy these games!!!
And if these games disappoint, try this:
You will NOT be disappointed, I assure you.... Delightful game.
