Sunday, September 28, 2014

What am I watching???

Wow... Hello!

I apologize to the whole pool....  I've been super busy.  I have some family problems....

But I'm not going to use excuses!  I'm not.  There are no excuses.  It's Football!

Well, today's Packer game at Chicago was more like it.   THAT'S the Packer Team we expected....

Ardita, well known Chicago Bears fan....  Chicago for 16....  I'm going to say yes, he does enjoy the pain....  And hey, there's nothing wrong with that.... We live in a world of legal gay marriage, legal mary jane, legal all sorts of stuff....

(May I say, in a world such as this, how utterly absurd it is to try and ban E-cigarettes???  Please...  E cigarettes are TRULY the least of our problems....  but I digress...)

But anyways, in the world we live in, is it wrong to be a masochist??  No.  It's not wrong.  Listen, in the privacy of your own home, whatever it is you do with a girl, and an Asian girl, and a Brazilian girl, and a couple sets of handcuffs, and a buggy whip.....  that's up to you, whatever trips your trigger.....  I mean, hey, as long as there's a safe word, and everybody's willing, and nobody gets hurt, and all that stuff.....  I mean, I know nothing about it, I'm just going off what I've read......

Ahem.  Let's stick to the football.....

Cheerleader Update:




A few Cheerleaders for you.....

Might be a long year for the Cowboys Cheerleading Squad.....

Anyways, I'm sitting here watching Philly at San Fran.....  These Eagles have all the answers for San Fran.... which is troubling, because the Packers have NO answers for the 49ers.....  Sigh.  At least we had the answers for the Chicago Bears.....  that's something....

I don't want to get into this, but I can't help myself....

Steven A Smith: suggests that women "bring it on themselves" in abuse cases: 1 week suspension.

Ray Rice: punches out his fiance' in an elevator, knocking her unconscious: 2 weeks suspension (which may I add, is a lot more than the court system gave him)

(And by the way, after you saw the first tape, Ray dragging his Fiancee out of the elevator by her hair, what did you THINK happened in that elevator???  Maybe I've seen too much, or hung around Cops for too long, but the tape of the knockout punch was exactly what I expected.....)

(Also, look, let me explain this very carefully to the young gamblers out there:  They are recording EVERYTHING in a Casino.   Have no illusions.  They are recording you in the can taking a whizz.  Elevators??  Absolutely.  And everybody knows it.  So, this science fiction about "not seeing the tape" is 50 times more absurd than light sabers or the plotlines of "True Blood", okay... Just so you know....  So, go to the Casino, have a good time, gamble it up a little bit.... But DO NOT act the fool.... They will have you on tape, and they will hang you by the b&lls.....  Do NOT do it....)

Bill Simmons: Says Roger Goodell is lying when he says he  didn't see the tape, which, by the way, roughly 99% of football fans agree with, and 100% of people who know anything about security procedure and police procedure agree with: 3 weeks suspension.

If you can explain how this makes any sense, feel free to e-mail me.   I'm just going to file this under "The fall of Western Civilization, Part IV, the post modern political correctness years.", because, quite honestly, I don't know what to do with these facts....

Moving right along, Tampa Bay beats the Steelers with a last second TD pass!!!  Unreal.   I'm starting to think that with the reduced practice time, and all that, it takes until week 4 for a team to really come together and start playing......

Crazy what you find out during these news breaks....  I thought I was losing my mind, I heard these weird beeps this morning in my house.....  I just heard, it was an Amber Alert Text, which I noticed later, but I never put it together.....  Just a little note, some people may or may not clear their whole house with a loaded M4 when they hear strange noises.....

Anywhoo, Fall is coming.  We're enjoying the best weather of 2014 right now, to be brutally honest.  It rained all summer, and was never that warm.  Now, it's 48 in the morning, but it warms up to the mid 70's in the afternoons, and it's been delightfully sunny.....  too bad I'm too busy to ride my Harley.  Someone needs to figure out how to carry a briefcase and a laptop on a Harley.  I know, I know, I can hear you out there, buy an Ultra Classic.  I don't WANT an Ultra classic, I'm a Road King guy....

Oh well....

To the young guys who read this, believe it or not, time starts to be a factor.   And, living here, a summer is such a precious thing, it's priceless.  We suffer horribly 8 months of the year, just waiting for summer.  If I stay here, what do I have, 12 good summer left, before my body breaks down???

I need to retire, and move down by Sears, or something, where there's 11 months of "doable" weather....  Not 4.....  to me, that would literally be like adding 24 years to my lifespan, if I could just do more, each year.....  Seriously, 12 x 3 = 36....  Minus 12 = 24.  Rough number, but seriously.

A guy in our pool, who shall remain nameless, told me he moved from Florida to California because he "hated Florida" and "Had to get out of there"....  Heh heh!  Really? REALLY?!?!?!?   This guy needs to winter in the Milwaukee Area once....  He'll be BEGGING for Florida.......  Begging... Begging, I tell you! 

As Gogo Yubari so famously said in "Kill Bill Volume One", "You call that begging?? (giggles) (turns serious) You can beg better than that."

This Nissan commercial is so absurd.  If you think a stock Nissan is so amazing, you NEED to go to World Class Driving in Las Vegas, and drive some Supercars, and find out what it's like to drive a real car with real power......

49ers just got a turnover off of San Francisco, and San Fran still looks totally discombobulated....  which is amazing, since in 3 games vs the 49ers, San Fran hasn't looked discombobulated for one second.....  unreal.....  why do the Packer have no answers for this team????

 
 Whoops!  Another Cheerleader crept in... sorry about that.

Saints are coming back against Teddy Bridgewater & the Vikings.....  Could be an actual game.

Frank Gore, another huge run....  Are these 49ers going to get back in this thing???  Just casually watching over my reading glasses, it's seemed like all Philly, but here we are Philly 21 49ers 20....

Phanatic Philly Phan is puking in his wastebasket right now.....

ttyl

Cadillac Pat

Sunday, September 7, 2014

A New Hope

Greetings!

Another Season begins...  full of hopes, and big dreams....

And quickly, those hopes are being dashed against the rocks....

Of course we have a Packer loss...  but that was somewhat expected....

Then, I joined a Survivor Pool.....  And for week 1, I took The Chicago Bears....  So there you go, pool over, thanks for playing, Bears lose at home to the woeful pathetic Buffalo Bills, quite likely the worst team in professional American tackle football....

There's a lesson there kids.  Never, never, never, and I mean never, never ever, not ever, never in your wildest dreams, should you depend on The stupid stinking pathetic worthless good for nothing Chicago Bears to win a football game.  Never.  Never!  Never ever do it.  Just say no.  Don't do it.  Never Do It.  Just don't.

I've never felt so sorry for Ardita in my life.  (And that's saying something.  If you drive a Mercedes Benz Coupe, probably nobody should feel sorry for you...)  Really, I never have.  What's it like to root for a bunch of pathetic losers???  Maybe he's a masochist, and he enjoys pain, I don't know.  He's probably a Cubs fan too, for all I know, I never actually asked.....  Maybe he likes it.

I see I'm the only person who took the Dallas Cowboys...  Really?  The ONLY person??  At home??  A Team that routinely wins a lot of their home openers??  Okay... Whatever. 

What you need to know about the Cowboys is, they START the season great, usually....  After thanksgiving, then they die.....

Ooops, I see they just fumbled, San Fran up 7-0 on a fumble recovery touchdown.....  Heh heh!  Okay....  sigh....  The Dallas Cowboys....  In another note, to illustrate what a small pathetic man Jerry Jones truly is, he came out and said he has "No Plans" to put Jimmy Johnson in the Ring of Honor.    Jerry, take a walk down the hall, and look at those 3 latest Super Bowl Trophies.  Jimmy got you those.  So put him in the Ring of Honor already....  Utterly and completely pathetic.  But then, we're used to that, with Jerry......

Ooops, I interrupt myself to report a Colin Kaepernick TD pass to Vernon Davis.  Your score in Arlington Texas, San Fran 14, Dallas 3.  Hmmm.  I'm starting to get a bad feeling about that Dallas pick....  It might be time to start drinking heavily.... Or, turn this game off.....  God, if that Stupid stinking Bears game wasn't enough, this should put me over the edge for sure......  I better start keeping a wastebasket over by the couch here, so I can puke in it.....

Wow.... Okay, I'm shaking it off!  I'm shaking it off.... I'm okay....

I was standing in line at the grocery store, and I saw Emmy Rossum on Cosmo.....  We all loved her in that Phantom of the Opera movie, didn't we??  Maybe it was just me.  Anyways, she says all men need is grilled cheese sandwiches and sex! 

Really?  I don't know who she's been dating, but for my money, Men also need BEER..... and they also need THE NFL.....  Some Jack Daniels never hurt anyone...  Bacardi & Cokes are always nice....  In no particular order, there's muscle cars, Cadillacs, Harleys, giant screen TV's, Trap Shotguns, and a whole plethora of other things.....

I'm not gonna lie though, I am very amused at the idea of being her boyfriend... hanging around her luxury California home, and she wanders in and says "what do you want, a grilled cheese sandwich, or sex?  Ooops. I'm out of grilled cheese...."  Hahahahahah!  That would be kind of funny.....

Update from Arlington Texas, SF 21 Dallas 3.  Ouch.  Starting to look like a long year in big D....  Oh well. 

Badgergil & Ardita look like they may pull away on these afternoon games.....  Highz and Smitty are lurking though....

Alright, good luck!  Some of you owe your pool fee....  You know who you are.  I'm not gonna threaten and all that.... I'm just going to boot people. 

Speaking of booting people, Tony Romo was just picked in the endzone....  ooof.  Whoa.   Let me be clear, I am not enjoying the pain....

Until next time!