We have met the enemy....

Hey, greetings!!!

Recovered from opening weekend yet???

Nah, me neither.... 14 straight hours in front of the Epic 60 inch LED will wear you out....

Ahhh, but the Football is back!

Congrats to ARDITA! A nice win...

Why does this feel like that scene in the Star Wars movie where the Emperor reveals that the Battle Station is FULLY OPERATIONAL?!??!?! Maybe it's just me.... Ardita, coming strong out of the gate....

Han Solo: "I've got a bad feeling about this...."

Yeah, no kidding....

We have some new players, as you may have noticed. Welcome to DJS26, STUDMONKEY, KCAMOSY, and SPARKY1987. I'm told they know NOTHING about Football, so, everyone just relax....

(They wouldn't lie to me, would they????)

DJS26 was making a play for it there.... I dunno....

Yeah, my picks were not great. I spent a little too much time imagining what *might* happen, instead of thinking about what might PROBABLY happen....

Anquan Boldin had a nice game against the Packers....

Now, can the Ravens go ahead and give back that sixth round pick, and have Boldin back??? NO?? Oh well....

What a beast.  And now he has a real Quarterback again..... Look out.

Cowboys Cheerleaders had plenty to cheer about... 6 turnovers against the hated Giants.  The Fraud That Is Eli Manning, already in midseason form, nice to see.....  Actually, that game should have been a blowout....  and now Tony Romo is hurt..... ouch....

News Item: Matt Flynn sold his house!

 

Not bad, not bad.... $1.4 million dollars, apparently...  this was his house in Seattle.  Maybe he should try a 1 year lease, and see how that goes.....  I mean, that would be a nice summer house... I'm not sure I'd want to be stuck there all year, though.....

(Yeah, right...)

That is Jacksonville, home of the Jacksonville Jaguars.  That's not 4 hours before kickoff people, that's the END OF THE 3RD QUARTER!!!

That's pretty empty.  Yeeesh.   Keep in mind, they adamantly do not want Tebow.  They do NOT.  They are apparently fundamentally opposed to anything that might draw people into their building....  Plus, they already have a guy who cannot play Quarterback, the immortal Blaine Gabbert....  who is now injured, and they need a QB.....  but no Tebow, please!    No no..... smh....

How about those Eagles???  Phanatic Philly Phan probably needed a defibrillator midway through the second quarter.....  that was a fun game to watch.... Chip Kelly, quite a debut....

Question: If a player straddling the ten yard line throws a pass, and a player at the 8&1/2  yard line bats it down, was the ball going forward, for a forward pass???  If you said no, congrats!  Not only are you bad at geometry, but you have a bright future as an official in the NFL!!!!

I promised myself I was going to stop b*tching about officiating, but holy crap.....  that's a promise made to be broken....

Alright people, we literally have less than 49 hours before the next football game.  I know, right??  Get your picks in, come correct, come strong with it.....

Rather than send 19 emails, everyone is paid up, okay, so relax.... Nobody is getting booted.   Fresh point spreads have landed on websites, like new fallen snow....

Congrats to the Cardinals!  I thought they would win, but they DID COVER.  Now, if there was a worldwide network of computers, and you could place bets in the British Virgin Isles, I may have had money on that.....

Until next week!

2013... And the Football Begins...

Hey, greetings to you, Players in Cadillac Pat's Pool!!!

The pool is open!

You should have recently received an invite in your email.

If your email needs updating, please update it on the Officefootballpool.com website. And you might let me know also, if you get a chance.

Last season was full of highlights....

Ardita had won the Season in 2010 and 2011.... Which, despite all my trash talking, is quite an amazing achievement. Probably never to be duplicated.

I (jokingly) pleaded with you to pick better, and unseat him... Well, I had to do it myself. I am YOUR FEARLESS LEADER for another year.... heavy lies the Crown.

I submit to you, gentle readers, it will be difficult to repeat. I think Ardita will keep that for life.

My research staff (being, me) went back through a few years of records, I couldn't find a perfect paper.... Last year we had TWO!

Week 7, in a highly unlikely development, Patrick686 had a perfect paper....

And in Week 11, the Big Headed Holy Rollers went Perfecto on us.... Nice job. All that Florida sunshine must be conducive to good picks....

Leo Woods won week 8 last year.... Some of you knew that Leo Woods was the "gambling pseudonym" for my neighbor & friend, Erv.

It is with a heavy heart that I tell you that Erv passed away last weekend. He has joined the big football pool in the sky. Erv was a great guy... We had a lot of laughs, talked a lot of trash, talked a lot of sports, and we may or may not have had a few beers from time to time....

For a guy his age, he was still very active until last fall, when some serious problems set in for him.... He'd be out shoveling snow at 6AM, he'd be packing the car in the predawn hours to drive to Green Bay, tailgate, and watch Packer Games... He was a Season Ticket holder for over 50 years. I suppose it's possible there was a bigger Packer Fan somewhere, but I don't know where. He was all about the Packers. He was retired from the United States Army after 28 years of highly decorated service to our Country.

It would be difficult to "sum up" Erv in 50 words or less.... he was one of these "force of nature" guys who was a constant in an ever-changing universe. He had an opinion, and he'd tell you about it, and that may have rubbed some people the wrong way, but he'd never lie to you, and he'd never sugarcoat it. I can't tell you how proud I am to say that he was my friend.

I've met his children, and one of his grandsons, and I know it would mean a great deal to them if you would kindly remember Erv for a second in your thoughts and prayers....

Heh heh Heh!!! Now, if Erv were here, I'm sure he'd say "Ohhh, whatthehellizzat!?!?!? Get rid of that! Just stick to the FOOTBALL!!! I don't want any of that...."

So okay, enough of that!!!!

Actually, my understanding is one of his sons is going to continue in the pool, so you in all likelihood will still see Leo Woods in the standings..... He may have had some ideas while he was entering Erv's Picks for him.... It gets harder when you have to pick them yourself. Fair warning....

Thursday, September 5th, 8:30 Eastern, Ravens at Broncos. The Season will KICK OFF!!!! Get your picks in!!! Set up your autopicks, if you know you'll be busy! Pay someone to pick for you! Do whatever you have to do, but GET YOUR PICKS IN!!!

Sunday, September 8th, 4:25 eastern, Packers at 49ers.... Just what we need, the 49ers.... Didn't we just play them??? Yeah, we did.

Good luck this season, and enjoy!

Let The Bodies Hit The Floor....

Hey, Happy New Year! If you're reading this, you survived. Good job.

Lot's of coaches and GM's being fired. The era of paitence is over.

To put us in the proper mood, review the epic video by The Drowning Pool, "Let The bodies Hit The Floor":


http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x1sqwq_drowning-pool-the-bodies-hit-the-fl_music

Alright then. I was going to go through the firings, but there's so many, it would take forever. Andy Reid, No surprise. I've joked all year about how Norv Turner got fired last year... Well, he finally got fired.

The most eyebrow-raising firing had to be Mike Reinfeldt, Senior VP & COO of the Tennessee Titans. Last year, he was elevated to that position, where he's more in charge of the financials, and they brought in a GM to run the team. Packer fans may recall, he was a highly placed executive with us during the Ron Wolf years, and was well thought of by many. Anyways, he was fired yesterday, but he didn't know it. He literally was at his desk working when TV & media reported his firing. People in the building wandered over to his office to offer their condolences, and found him sitting at his desk working, having no idea he'd been fired. Nice. Real nice.

It was suggested by a Titans blogger that Bud Adams, 90 year old owner of the Titans, may have been unaware that Reinfeldt was no longer the GM of football operations... Whoa.... Wow. All I can say is, wow. So the GM and Mike Mullarkey (HC) will stay, but Reinfeldt is out. Someone feel free to email me & explain how that makes any sense...

Cheerleader Update:

Broncos Cheerleaders had plenty to cheer about... Broncos have a bye.

Rams Cheerleaders, not so much. The did beat the 49ers and tie the 49ers this year though.... I would like to schedule a special consultation with them, to figure out how WE will beat the 49ers....

(And before you send me those emails, look: We're beating the Vikings Saturday. We are. Book it. Money line the Packers in this one, and pay off your Christmas bills.)

(Editor's Note: You HOPE we are....)

Season's Championship:

Well, some goofball named Patrick686 won the Seasons championship. Wait, that's me!!! Bwahh hah haha! Amazing.

You might recall, Ardita, die hard Bears fan, won the Season the last TWO years. I challenged you people last year to pick better, and not let him win a 3rd time. Geez, do I have to do everything myself??? Kidding, many of you did beat Ardita for the season...

Still quite an accomplishment, never been done before in this pool. I have a lot of fun with Ardita, and his Bears fandom, but seriously, as his reign as OUR FEARLESS LEADER comes to an end, I tip my cap to you sir. Back to back, that's amazing.

Now I will wear the Crown... for a year, I'll enjoy it. I have no grand delusions of repeating.... I think that's a feat, like Cal Ripken, that will never be broken.

By the way, Smitty201 made a furious charge Sunday, to tie Monjon for 2nd place. You see in the standings Smitty201 is 2, Monjon is 3. Tiebreaker differential is the first tiebreaker. So, when you put those points on Monday Night Football, uhh, that matters.

Seriously, after 17 weeks, who woulda thunk it!?!?!? Who would think we'd need a tiebreaker for the season!!! Unbelievable.

NFL MVP: My NFL MVP is Adrian Peterson. How is it not him??? A dominating performance against the Pack. Dominant all year, coming off a complete knee reconstruction. Go ahead and email me your case for Peyton Manning, but I'll tell you right now, you're wrong. The Broncos and Tim Tebow went into the playoffs last year and beat the vaunted Steelers, without Peyton Manning. They were good before he ever showed up. The Vikings were horrible without Peterson. Horrible. Thus, he must be your MVP.

Alleged "Experts"

I do this every year, I like to see how the handicappers in our pool measure up to the highly paid analysts who do this on TV and the internet. For the first time in a long time, several pundits did outpick us. Take a look:

Wickersham, ESPN 179-77

Mortensen, ESPN 178-78

Mike Silver, Yahoo Sports 175-81

Patrick686, CPP 170-85-1

Chris Carter, ESPN 169-87

Monjon, CPP 168-87-1
Phanatic Philly Phan, CPP 168-87-1
Yahoo Users 168-88

Smitty201, CPP 167-88-1
Gregslo, CPP 167-88-1
Leo Woods, CPP 167-88-1

Mike Florio, Profootballtalk 163-88-1

And hey, even Bulldogs Rule, down at 152-103-1, were about as good as Keyshawn Johnson at ESPN, who was 154-102, but really was 153-102-1 with the tie. So, congrats to everyone. Nice job. Nobody embarassed themselves.

There you have it. The 2012 regular season is complete.

As Bruce Willis so famously said in the movie "The Siege", "I intend to finish this operation and be back on base in time for the Playoffs."

I suggest you do the same!

Twas The Night Before Christmas...

Hey, Good Morning!

Well, week 14, Badgergil did break through and win a week. Nice job man! New England, getting all over Houston for you there....

Is it time to start worrying about Houston?? Maybe...

Week 15, The Florida Boys won again. Two wins. Congrats! And the Big Headed Holy Rollers have 3 wins. Hmm. The Florida sunshine must be good for their picks...

Week 16, KathB4 wins a tiebreaker. Nice job, congrats! The Seattle Seahawks, getting all over the vaunted 49ers... Big tiebreaker number. Seahawks are rolling. I suppose the 49ers should take some solace.... they kept Seattle under 50, and score 14 points of their own, which is a helluva lot more than recent Seahawk opponents have managed....

Cheerleader Update:

Cowboys Cheerleaders showing some Christmas Spirit.... and despite that pathetic loss, they could still get in the playoffs.... I may need to stop watching these Cowboys games... the emotional rollercoaster is killing me. The Packer game was more my style. Whuppp up on someone, end the suspense...

Jets flight crew, celebrating Christmas... Jets managed to beat Jacksonville. Allegedly, according to anonymous sources, Tebow will be a Jacksonville Jaguar next year. (shaking my head) What the entire nation has known for a year, Jacksonville finally figured out. Maybe they oughtta go get Tebow... Ya think?? Really??

Colts Cheerleaders, in blue santa outfits.... Another win for the Colts. This is probably what drives Lions fans and Bills fans crazy. Indy went from an absurd 2 win team last year, to a legitimate playoff team. So, it is possible to turn your team around.

Have a Merry Christmas. Best wishes to you & your families.

1 more week. These seasons, they seem to fly by, don't they?

Big Showdown

Hey, good evening!

I finally had to just put all the other emergencies aside, and get straight to this. Seems to be an ongoing problem, getting sidetracked on other things....

First off, The Big Headed Holy Rollers did end up being perfect in Week 11. Unbelieveable. Two perfect papers in one season. Kind of insane. Nice job man!

Week 12, we had Erin07 breaking through for a win. It was over Sunday afternoon, before the Packers went down to the hated Giants. Even Football Outsiders don't keep stats on dropped interceptions, but Eli MUST be the all time leader....

Week 13, Air Myles!!! He beat me fair and square, what can I say. The only game that really would have helped me was Oakland. I have bad news for Oakland haters: Carson Palmer is getting the job done. His young and pathetic receiving corps is dropping EVERYTHING. They must dunk their hands in butter before the games. Unbelievable. You'd think the coaches would tell them to stop doing that.... Ball, after ball, right in the hands, dropped dropped dropped...

That brings us to tonight. Tonight is kind of wide open. Badgergil, Smitty201, and Sears could all win. Real good game, too. Possible AFC Championship preview. Should be a good one. I'm sure I'll stay awake for at least the first quarter....

Smitty201 is quietly on a roll lately... I see you over there. I see you.

Larry Fitzgerald's Father says the Cardinals have quit. Do ya think? A 58-0 loss??? Ugh. Sour. Cardinals have just signed Brian Hoyer off waivers... another Quarterback for their musical quarterbacks act... Some of you might remember Hoyer as a pretty decent Michigan State Spartans QB.... Was signed by the Patriots as an undrafted free agent in 2009. Released in August of 2012.

A report has been floated that Jon Gruden is in talks to rejoin the Raiders. I have continually heard that he's the next Cowboys head coach... Who knows.

Feels like there's a lotta coaches on the hot seat. Could we see ten opeings this offseason?? We might. Cards, Chargers, Panthers, KC, Philly, Buffalo, Cleveland... those seem like locks. Then we move into the Cowboys, Jacksonville, Detroit area of maybe's... Leslie Frazier of the Vikings got the big vote of confidence earlier today... How are the Vikings not signing Hoyer, or somebody??? Ponder is regressing. I like the guy, but he is regressing. Adrian Peterson is setting the world on fire, and you're barely above .500??? Ugh. Is AP going to end up as Barry Sanders 2.0???

btw, if you're not watching "A Football Life" on the NFL Network, you should be. Also, 30 for 30 had a great piece on Bo Jackson. Brought back a lot of memories.

Cheerleader Update:

Vikings Cheerleaders were fired up about a home win over the Bears... Ardita must have spiked mhy Jack Daniels with something, I picked the Bears again... what was I thinking?!?!? Maybe my amusement with the Smokin Jay Cutler website is screwing up my brain....

Seahawks Cheerleaders have had plenty to cheer about... 58-0, that'll wear out your cheerleaders....

And finally, instead of going off on a 10,000 word rant that'll just upset me anyways, let me try and express my feelings about Mr. Bob Costas nonverbally:

Hey Bob?? Keep your factually incorrect gun-grabbing opinions out of my Football broadcasts, okay??? Okay.

Three more weeks, people. Only 3. Good luck!

Stinging in the rain...

Hey, good evening.

First off, Week 10: Phanatic Philly Phan! Congrats!

Tough to be an Eagles fan right now... yikes. He's going to need to increase his dosage, I fear...

Philly Phan Lost his starting QB, (and that might not be a bad thing, depending on who you ask), His coach probably signed his own death warrant, and he lost to the hated Cowboys. but he DID win the week in the pool! So he's got THAT going for him....

Obvious officiating Blunder, week 10

San Fran and the Rams. Over 1 and a half minutes is mysteriously run off the clock?? And it can't be put back? Huh? And as the game wound down, there were numerous bizarre clock machinations. the announcers totally ignored it of course, but both coaches spent the 4th quarter screaming about the resetting of the play clock, one way or the other...

Pathetic. Remind me again, when are the real officials coming back?? Were these guys fired from the lingerie football league?? What gives??

Hold on, I'm getting a text from an intern here... Those apparently WERE the real officials. Hard to believe. Seriously.

Week 11: Big Headed Holy Rollers win again! 3 wins??? This is getting ridiculous. And, they have a chance at perfection tonight. Unreal. Nice job.

Obvious Officiating Blunder, week 11

Dallas Texas. Notorious blowhard Ed Hochuli goes under the hood, reviews the play, then comes back onto the field to announce that the play stands as called, and that the play is not reviewable. Huh?? You just reviewed it.... It's not reviewable? Uhhh, so why were you reviewing it??? Just wondering...

Truly pathetic. When do the real officials come back?? These ARE the real officials??? Why don't I believe you??? We were screaming to have these guys back, eh??? How's that working out???

Cheerleader Update

Minnesota Vikings Cheerleaders showing some military pride. God bless our military, thank you for all you do, we love you, we support you, we are with you. The freedoms we enjoy are because of you. Thank you.

Smokin Jay Cutler is out. Campbell is in. Bears are down 17 to nuthin. Packer Nation is loving this, needless to say. And for once, it won't be Jay Cutler's fault... Strange. Who will the rabid dogs in the Chicago media blame for this one?? Will they finally cast a wayward eye at Lovie Smith???

Naaah. It's probably all Tim Tebow's fault, somehow, some way... The beauty of Tebow right now is, his value might be even higher than it was last year. The Jets have so horribly misused him, who knows?? It's not like he got a chance, and stunk. He's been very carefully placed into perfect positions where he can only fail. Rex, while you're not too busy filming foot fetish videos for Youtube, remind us again why you traded for this guy??? and why don't you trade him now?? Obviously, there's no plan whatsoever to use him in any way that might help your football team...

Jerry Jones was having quite a conversation with Mike Holmgren prior to the game... Next Cowboys head coach?? Sean Payton?? Mystery candidate?

(Watching Jerry doing things lately, he'll give Jason Garrett a ten-year guaranteed extension...)

Good Luck! On behalf of KathB4 and myself, best wishes for a Happy Thanksgiving! Have fun and be safe! Thaw that Turkey before you throw it in the deep fryer. And for Pete's sake, don't set the fryer up in the living room.

Upset Specials

Hey, good evening...

Week 9: The Big Headed Holy Rollers! The second win of the season! Nice job. Nice. The Tampa Bay Pick was a thing of beauty.

Doug Martin. He's a beast! And he's wearing Emmitt Smith's number, which can't be all bad. These Bucs are starting to roll...

Absurdly Bad Call Of The Week

Yeah, it's a feature now. Ben Roethlisberger drops back to pass. His arm is hit, he throws the ball forward, ball falls very short... And is ruled a fumble?!?!?! Huh?? It's supposed to be ruled a fumble if the pass attempt involves "the empty hand going forward."

Let's go to the Rule book. The rules of football state: "When a Team A player is holding the ball to pass it forward, any intentional forward movement of his hand starts a forward pass, even if the player loses possession of the ball."

So there. Incomplete. Clearly incomplete. So why were the Giants allowed to pick up the ball and run 70 yeards for a score??? Why did the Zebras treat this is a fumble???

I'm telling you right now, it's time to bring back the real officials.... Hold on, I'm being handed a note from an intern here.... Those WERE the real officials?!?!? Wow. Nice. Yeeesh. SOOO lucky we have the "real" officials back....

The Steelers winning the game defused any controversy that may have ensued, but still, that's pathetic....

Vote Of Confidence History

Regular readers have by now become familiar with my adage that When a Head Coach receives "the dreaded vote of confidence" from the owner or General Manager, his days are numbered....

Vote of confidence history was made this weekend.... Friday evening, The Buss family gave the dreaded "vote of confidence" to Lakers coach Mike Brown. Their presser stated that they felt he needed "more time". Saturday morning, when I awaken, the press release is already out that Mike Brown has been fired. That's a new land speed record, to go from vote of confidence to Fired. I guess more time meant 8 or 9 hours.... Whew!

This week, we have an intriguing contest: Dallas at Philadelphia. Could be the ultimate "loser gets fired" sort of game. Andy Reid and Jason Garrett both have to be on a hot seat, don't they??? I like how the pundit-ocracy out there is billing this as a game between two teams "trying to keep their playoff hopes alive". Uh, really?? both of these teams are DOA, I hate to break that to you. I don't see either team in the Playoffs, unless something truly dramatic happened. This delusion apparently permeates both locker rooms as well, as both Head Coaches have made numerous comments this week to the effect that "If we can just get on a roll, and string together some wins..." Uh, fellas, you'd need to finish 7-1 the rest of the way to have any shot. Not happening. I have nothing against Andy Reid per se, but his body language has really gone out the window. He looks like a guy who really doesn't want to be on the sidelines anymore....

Speaking of body language, have you guys (and girls) checked out the "Smokin Jay Cutler" website?? It's awesome.

http://smokinjaycutler.tumblr.com/

Check that out. In a bizarre coincidence that only Ardita can appreciate, Smokin Jay is undefeated since the site went up.

Hey, good luck this week!