Last week, I think I left you with something along the lines of "We can only hope that the fraud that is the New York Giants will finally be exposed."
Oops. Guess not. The Great and Mighty Carolina Panthers, the "hottest team in the nfc", no dice. Nice. Thanks guys. 'preciate that.
Anyway, Tonight's game, for the first time in a few weeks, I think, will have some meaning. Air Myles is going to be wearing the big cheesehead out to the local sports bar and pulling hard for the Packers. Which is going to look a little silly down in Texas, but, oh well. KathB4 is going to be pulling for the Bears, and those 11 luscious points. Normally, that couldn't happen, but she's actually from Michigan, so, she might survive rooting for the Bears for a couple hours. If I were to root for the Bears for 5 minutes, my head would explode like that dude from the movie "Scanners". Seriously. I cannot do it. Not even for money.
So, good luck to both of you tonight...
I was actually looking good for a win, until the late Sunday games started... And that's despite my brilliant pick of the Dallas Cowboys. Ugh. Nobody emailed me and told me TO is gone next year... Seriously, I need to hear it. Anybody notice that Romo's INT's typically come when he's trying to force the ball into Owens??? Anyone?? Bueller? Anybody notice that Owens makes no effort to help his QB by breaking it up in those cases??
I dunno if you remember a dude named Michael Irvin, but he battled for every ball. Every ball. He'd take an offensive Pass Interference call just to break up an interception. T.O., you might want to watch some film of what a truly great Dallas receiver looks like... 'cause you ain't it, bro....
So that's how we close out Texas Stadium... by allowing an opposing running back to score on the longest run from scrimmage in Texas Stadium History. While Roger Staubach, Emmit Smith, and Michael Irvin, and a host of other Cowboy greats look on... nice. Hopefully air sickness bags were available for those guys....
If you didn't see the game, which you probably didn't, it was even more painful watching it live. Ouch. I never thought I'd be sorry that I have AT&T U-verse, and get NFL Network in HD. But I am now.... OOooh. I'm still taking Percodans, to try and get over that one.... Uuuuhmmm. Still hurts...
But back to my point, I was in it until the afternoon games started.
NY Jets at Seattle. Jets are heavy favorites. They need a win. Seattle has been mailing it in for weeks. NO brainer, right? Whuups. Okay, lost that one....
Houston at Oakland. The surging Houston Texans, going into Oakland. No problem. Heavy favorites. Al Davis might be clinically Insane. Looks like a Houston win. Whuuaaaatt??? Okay, another loss...
Buffalo at Denver. Right. Denver, tough at home in Mile High, desperately needing a win, heavily favored over a Bills Team that quit two weeks ago under the legendary Dick Jauron.... Huh? Hmmm, another loss.
Philly at Washington. The suddenly resurgent Eagles go into Fed Ex Mausoleum as big favorites over the skidding Redskins... Aaaand, Donovan McNabb remembers that he sucks, and they lose.
Atlanta at Minnesota. Yeah, I saw some of this debacle... The great Vikings, on a winning streak, Tavaris Jackson playing great.... ohh, the talking heads love Minnysoda. At home, no less, favored even.... And 362 fumbles later, we have Atlanta.
Packer fan, keep in mind, Arizona is in a sucky division, but they DID manage to take care of business, and wrap it up weeks ago. This Vikings team is sloppy, undisciplined, features an absurdly vanilla offense, and a vaguely disorganized and unrepentant defense. They are not what you'd call, ohh, let's say, "good." And yet, they are the power in the NFC North. This division is weaker than Campbell's Chicken noodle soup with 6 cans of water added, okay... and yet, the fabled Green Bay Packers utterly failed to take control when we could have. That game against the Vikings, everyone in the stadium knew that Frerrotte was not going to be allowed to throw on that last drive. Everyone. Not after 2 ugly picks. Well, everyone except the Packer D, I guess. That win would have put us in control of the division... and we gave it away, for nothing.
There's your guy... Ted Thompson. If you want more hate, check out firetednow.com Worth a look. He's fielded the youngest team in the NFL for 3 straight years, and sent the face of the franchise and only real leader we had packing off to New York.... And we've been tens of millions under the cap for 3 years now. So, this isn't like an Episode of "Law and Order: Criminal Intent" here.... We don't really need Detectives Goren and Eames to solve this one.... I say again, there's your guy.
Anyway, the cherry on top of Late Sunday had to be The great Carolina Panthers losing to the fraudulent New York Giants... Nice.
You could have thrown together a 6-team parlay of ALL DOGS and WON THEM ALL STRAIGHT UP!!! What are the frickin' odds of THAT?!?!??! (If you're not a gambling degenerate, and you don't know what a parlay is, ignore. Although you could think of it this way: If you rolled one die, what are the odds it would come up 1 or 2 six straight times?!?!? I'll give you a hint: reeeeaallly long.)
If you haven't noticed, I took the complete collar. 0 for 6 in later games. And I had the favorite in every game.
(Lights another cigarette, paces the house restlessly, trying to make sense of it....)
And it's so bitterly cold out, I.... I dunno, I don't even know what to say. I'm trying not to think of 3 more months of this crap....
As always, note to Wisconsin Employers, you may as well open at noon tomorrow. At the very least, don't expect much... This could be the last time the Pack appears on Monday Night Football for a good long while... Enjoy. Drink it in...
And good luck to Air Myles and KathB4...
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